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Report - LDV, Hired and Fired in One Day.


I Go Where The Drains Are
Regular User
My life as a male prozzy in London wasnt working out too well as nobody likes haemorrhoids as big as a gorillas nipples... so i packed up my swag and headed to Birmingham, where i got a job at a company who make Vans that dont work very well and are descended from Austin Allegros.

I lasted one day... just couldnt take the job seriously. In the end i got a bit carried away and management called the local constabulary to have me removed.

Im now back in London, and finding that a firm buttplug is keeping my gigolo lifestyle on track.

Heres a few picks of my day, working for Leyland Daf.

Couldnt keep out of them for a start:

Work ethic was crap, kept hitting things when they wouldnt work:

Wouldnt come down and insisted on singing 'Im the king of the Castle':

Food and canteen service was crap:

Found the floor polisher to be 'too vibrateyy':

Kept trying to 'open Portals':

Pretend rally driving with extra engine, gear change, brass clutch engagement and wheelspin sound effects doesnt impress your average foreman:

Again, couldnt keep out of them:

Mmmm, i love big headlights... do you like mine?

Its missing half its cylinders and its got 'fuel injection'.... wtf i cant win burnout compititions with a lawnmower engine:

Nearly strangled myself with some door rubbers:

Do you want it manual, or air assisted?

Twilight Zone:

Needs a lick of paint you'dve thought, no one likes primer.

I kept getting lost you see :(


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